If I had a boss, or could risk being fired from my job, this is exactly the kind of blog that would get me into trouble. But I don’t. And one of the perks of self employment is being able to say it how it is without censorship.
I’ve got a bee in my bonnet so I want to address a couple of issues that I’ve been having lately in the hope that people will understand me a little better.
A Labour of Love?
When I started my business over 5 years ago, I always said it was a labour of love. I was doing what I enjoyed for the first time in a long time. I was making corsets, skirts, tiered petticoats, ties, bow ties, cravats, French knickers, camisoles and then eventually started producing knickers (panties).
I was pleasantly surprised when things really kicked off with the satin panties. I love catering to the needs of my clients, who often can’t get what they want on the high street. Clients who appreciate the work I put in and the care I put in.
But I’m starting to worry that people are not actually following my social media accounts because they admire my craft. I can see that my work has attracted a lot of attention from the wrong kind of audience.
Things I’m not here to do…
When I first started to notice I was getting the wrong kind of attention, I often brushed it off. But now it’s becoming so frequent. Here’s a list of things I am not here to do:
- I’m not here to appease lonely men browsing through Instagram for pictures of (women in) panties. If men (or people of any gender) want to follow me and discuss my products as prospective customers, you are more than welcome to DM me or comment on the photos. If you want someone to flirt with, I’m afraid you’re in the wrong place.
- I am not here to sexualise my products or to sexualise models – hence my lack of images featuring models. If I was making more than just lingerie (which I plan to do in the not so distant future) then I would use models more regularly. But I am sick and tired of people saying they want to see pictures of the panties on models – I think most of them really just want to see pictures of half naked models – the internet is already full of that and it’s not what I’m here to do.
- I am not here to be sexualised by my followers! Please do not keep posting comments on Instagram/Facebook/Twitter saying you would love to see me modelling my panties. What the actual F? I have loved sewing for as long as I can remember. Please just let me be. I am a seamstress, a designer, a business owner. I’m not going to start posing half naked just because some sleazy old fart has commented on my Instagram (I am SO sorry to be so blunt, but it’s freaking rude, and I really shouldn’t have to put up with this kind of treatment!).
I could go on, but as you can tell, it kind of brings out my angry side. And that side is not pretty!
Respect and Anonymity
People hide behind the anonymity of the internet to behave in ways they wouldn’t in real life. It happens everywhere, from social media, to dating sites, and apparently even when it comes to online shopping. Usually, the actual paying customers are VERY polite, respectful, kind, understanding… The kind of people I want to be doing business with. And I’m so grateful to have these wonderful clients!
I don’t appreciate people sending me NSFW images. I do not have any desire for any client of any gender to send me images of themselves in panties just to satisfy their exhibitionist urges! And be honest with yourself, if you fall into this category. There is a difference between sending me a tasteful, well lit photo to help me with my business and my marketing or to show me how the products fit, and sending me a poorly shot picture just because you’re getting off on the thrill of showing off. In short: it is not my job to engage in this kind of communication with anyone, client or not, no matter how much you spend in my store.
I’m sorry that I have to post a blog like this. In a perfect world, people wouldn’t mistreat me in the first place and I wouldn’t need to get angry. I know it’s not really good for business, but this is not about money. You can not put a price on respect. Haters are going to hate – such is life. I came here for a reason and I would rather be authentic and keep the followers who give a damn about me as a person, than to put up with horrible treatment for the sake of popularity.